Friday, 21 March 2014

Saying goodbye to Summer

beach couple, suzi poland 2014

Sitting solitary, saying goodbye. Sitting, crying, tears streaming from my eyes, down my cheeks. Outside lawn mowers mow and birds are singing in the trees. At the beach people still come to sit and swim in the warm sea water.

It’s the Equinox and without the breeze the sun no longer burns. It’s that perfect warm. That gorgeous gentle you wish could go on and on, but it wont. It wont because nothing goes on forever. Seasons come and seasons go and we move with them whether we like it or not.

What has struck me lately is not the fear of change, nor the need for courage in the face of change or the wisdom to know where to go or what to do. All that is needed is simply the ability to be still. Be in the moment as it changes from this ... to that. For we are moving, all of us, simply by standing still. Time and this planet move for us.

Allowing change to happen is what most of us find hard. Maybe not so much when it’s intentional change, change we create, but certainly when change is imposed upon us. Life stages, life phases.

Maybe what is hard is not the unknown, but living without the known. What we have, the way we are, what we do, who we are. Maybe instead of fear it is sadness that is the greatest challenge. Maybe the impending loss of the familiar is what needs to be acknowledged if moving on is not to be accompanied by regret or resentment.

Simply being still, allowing the change, like watching ripples cross a pool we can watch ourselves leave one space and enter another. No drinking, no smoking, no eating, no busying ourselves, no talking to friends, just being in that space. It can feel quite surreal, it can feel too real. Living that present, that “in the now” can be overwhelming ... maybe this the only scary part.

Usually we run from this moment, it’s seemingly emptiness, but with practice maybe we can come to love the heightened awareness of what’s coming next, ensuring our arrival in the new space, fully conscious, fully present, fully grateful, without regret.

Then, stepping off the metaphysical ripple ... we arrive at the other side.

whale beach montage, suzi poland 2014

Tears dried, salt crusted on the skin, reminding me of what’s gone ... I sleep, for tomorrow it will be Autumn. 

If you'd liked this post, you might also like my poem Crossing Over. If you'd like to see what I created this Summer, here are links to my blog posts Summer Love and People Sketching at the Beach in Late Summer


Suzanne said...

Lovely post Suzi. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and how you process the emotions and changes in your life. Big hug. xo

Sandy King said...

Well spoken Suzi. Honest and from the heart. Honoured that you shared and grateful that you were able to articulate why those imposed transitions in life leave us feeling out of sync . " Maybe what is hard is not the unknown, but living without the known ".. just wow to that statement alone. And your pictures are beautiful punctuation points to your post. Just lovely. XX

Jenny DF said...

The change we do not choose. Difficult emotions eloquently stated. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. The part that Sandy quoted resonates here as well.

Creatively yours Fi said...

What a stunningly beautiful post Suzi. Gorgeous photos too! I had a lump in my throat. I REALLY love your simple sketches capturing moments in time at the beach. Maybe you could put together a reflective book or calendar with these sketches. too. (I'd buy one xX)

suzi poland said...

Thank you very much for these wonderful comments. I felt slightly anxious pressing publish on this post, Being vulnerable, honest and raw is not easy. I gain much solace and wisdom from my drawing practice but writing is new to me. It is so special that you received it the way I intended. Fiona, I certainly will consider your suggestions. Thank you.